March 2011

To see familiar faces, even when it’s only through pictures, brought feelings I have not felt in a very long time – pure wholeness.
It made me sad
It made me regret
It made me scared
It made me cry
It made me happy

I don’t care
I am doing it
I think I already have accepted the worst anyway
At this point, I’ve got nothing else to lose

For a chicken, I took whatever courage I do not have and sent her a message:
“Hi, how are you? It’s me. I hope you still remember me. I hope you don’t hate me. You look the same – still very beautiful! I miss you” – like that would make up for the things that I have done.

Why did I turn my back on them?
Why did I take the wrong turn?
Now I have no one but this blog to show my true weaknesses

Ironic or appropriate that I am listening to “I am my friend” by 3000 Realms as I wallow in sorrow

Am I being dramatic?
Am I just doing this to cry to put myself to sleep coz god knows I have sleeping problems
Wait, no, it’s neither
This one is real
I can feel the pain
It feels good
It helps
It teaches me who I truly am


Dear Jealousy,

I know you have been trying to get to me since the day I was born.
You will never get to me.
Nonetheless, I must admit, you’re affect on others has been driving me nuts lately!
Nuts! I tell you!
Must I, constantly, put myself down in order for your minions to feel better about themselves?